My 2025 - Looking Back in Retrospect

As another year comes to a close, I find myself standing in a quiet space of reckoning. This year has been heavy with reflection—the kind that doesn’t ask politely but insists on being felt. Friendships have shifted, some drifting softly, others breaking in ways that still ache. There has been a lingering longing for a love that no longer exists, a shadow that follows me into quieter moments. Alongside that came job anxiety, the constant hum of uncertainty about stability, purpose, and whether I’m doing enough, or becoming enough.

This year also forced me to look inward in ways I had long avoided. Choosing to start therapy was both frightening and necessary—a decision rooted in finally admitting that I don’t have to carry everything alone. I’ve worried about the future more than I’d like to admit: financially, emotionally, existentially. There’s been a persistent fear of ending up alone, of time moving faster than my ability to build the life I imagined. And yet, within all of this, I’ve begun the slow, uncomfortable process of unlearning people-pleasing—of realising that my worth is not measured by how much I give at the expense of myself.

As I look toward 2026, I don’t feel resolved or healed, but I do feel more honest. I’m carrying forward the lessons, the grief, the courage it took to face myself this year. I’m learning that growth doesn’t always look like confidence or clarity—sometimes it looks like showing up scared, choosing boundaries, and allowing hope to exist alongside fear. I don’t know exactly what the next year will bring, but I’m stepping into it more aware, more grounded, and a little more willing to trust that I’m allowed to take up space in my own life.